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Finer Facts

Finer Facts:

Monday, August 22, 2011

The Imperativeness of the Pocket Square

In a world filled with vanity, there are many function-less and over extravagant ways for one to decorate themselves. One accessory, namely the pocket square, has kept its classic roots, only to be grossly underused by today's gentlemen. Nothing quite says finer thing like a silk square tucked neatly inside one's bosom pocket, patiently awaiting its opportunity to be used in suave and gentlemanly ways. You see, intrigued reader, pocket squares hold a myriad of functions.

Uses of the pocket square include but are not limited to:

  • Wiping the spilled wine off the table as it nears your lady's expensive dress.
  • Shielding spilled wine in midair from ruining your lady's expensive dress because you have extraordinary quick reflexes.
  • Absorbing the spilled wine from your lady's expensive dress because you have slow, sloth like reflexes.
  • Gently slapping insubordinate people to remind them to mind their manners.
  • A tourniquet to save your friend's leg from that nasty shark wound.
  • Wiping away the tears of the bride's parents
  • Magic tricks
  • Emergency bull fighting 

The fine part of the pocket square lies in its simplicity. A pocket square should always be folded modestly, never yelling and begging for the attention of others. Rather, it should gently whisper to others as they subconsciously admire your neatness. A two or three triangle fold is usually appropriate. While many other complex and exotic methods for folding exist, we highly recommend avoiding them.
Don't even try.

Stay Classy,
William & Walter
Quadruple U