Dire Grievances

A reading from the book of Pet Peeves, Chapter 1, Verses 1-10.


v.1. Thou shall not use the name of class in vain.

v.2.Thou shall not attempt to draw attention to oneself by increasing their volume or speeding up their articulation whilst praying aloud in a group.

v.3. Thou shall not miss a belt loop.

v.4. Thou shall not sport clothes, even of a finer nature, out of season.

v.5. Thou shall not promote the phrase "Real men wear pink", for it is a heresy.

v.6. Thou shall not use the expression "lol" aloud, for it is unwieldy and outdated.

v.7. Thou shall not boast about thy area code to which thou identifies with.

v.8. Thou shall not button thy top button on ones polo or button down shirt unless sporting a tie.

v.9. Thou shall not dangle one's lanyard out of his pocket.

v.10. Thou shall not sport an inappropriate amount of sweat bands.


Amen.



Sincerely,


William & Walter
W&W
Quadruple U

Lighthouses

Its brilliant light illuminates the mysteries of the sea. 
Its grand stature keeps watch over treacherous waters. 
Its iconic  appearance is timeless.

      There is an aura of mystery and yet, comfort, that is brought forth by a lighthouse's presence. Whether witnessed in an artist's rendering or experienced through ones life, lighthouses have been thought provoking figures for centuries. Today, lighthouses do not offer much in terms of guiding vessels to safety. But the void left by lighthouses' lack of functionality in today's world is replenished by various elements of unadulterated class.

• Each lighthouse is like a diary, whispering to us all the fascinating things it has witnessed since its birth upon a rock. Tales of successful guidance to the shore and recollections of the constant hard work put forth to maintain the lighhouse are woven into its cylindric architecture.
• A lighthouse does not hide. Its brilliant lamp sits upon a statuesque base, reminding the coastline of its protective nature.
• And most importantly, a lighthouse is timeless. They are mighty testaments to the boundary between the land we reside on and the treacherous waters we valiantly explore.

A lighthouse kisses the sky and hugs the coast with all its splendor. 

Seldom does a man made object grace this earth with such a classic nature. In its silence and humility, a lighthouse manages to tell so much with a great deal of pride. The horizon and a lighthouse collaborate to create a wonderful panorama, for they need each other like you need this blog. In summation, lighthouses enhance a coastline's scenery where most works of human hands fall short of complementing any landscape, leading us to the conclusion that a lighthouse is, without argument, a finer thing.

William & Walter

W & W

Quadruple U

Dropping a Cap

The art of dropping a cap is one of great importance in literature. The cap has a great, albeit modest, nature that comfortably dwells within the world of finer things. Now, what exactly is dropping a cap? Don't fret, oh dear apprentices of class, we shall alleviate your daunting curiosity. Our more experienced readers may prefer the phrase "embedding an elevated character upon ones prose". Often misunderstood, the purpose of this wonderful literary mechanism is to set a tone that says "this literary work, which has lain dormant awaiting a single, paramount moment that will fulfill its purpose of enlightening its reader, should contain class". Even if the content that follows the capital letter is stupid or disappointing, one should still be able to (on a more philosophical level) appreciate the tangible beauty of hand written characters and the intricacies of language. On another note, you may read this and believe that if you capitalize all your letters, you will be of supreme class. But alas, you are gravely mistaken. As with all things class, the cap must be used with temperance and moderation.

Even one Spongebob Squarepants appreciates the
 literary value of dropping a cap

This cap not only encompasses the literal capitalization of the first letter in a literary work, but also takes on the adjective meaning of the word capital -meaning "excellent, chief, or important". Let that be a small vocabulary lesson that we suggest you apply to your daily life.

Capitalization of the first linguistic character in a literary work, ordinary sentence, or a solitary word, is truly of finer nature.

North

On that note,

William and Walter

Quadruple U